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551
I
listened
to
my
father
in
silence
and
remained
for
some
time
incapable
of
offering
any
reply
.
I
revolved
rapidly
in
my
mind
a
multitude
of
thoughts
and
endeavoured
to
arrive
at
some
conclusion
.
Alas
!
To
me
the
idea
of
an
immediate
union
with
my
Elizabeth
was
one
of
horror
and
dismay
.
I
was
bound
by
a
solemn
promise
which
I
had
not
yet
fulfilled
and
dared
not
break
,
or
if
I
did
,
what
manifold
miseries
might
not
impend
over
me
and
my
devoted
family
!
Could
I
enter
into
a
festival
with
this
deadly
weight
yet
hanging
round
my
neck
and
bowing
me
to
the
ground
?
I
must
perform
my
engagement
and
let
the
monster
depart
with
his
mate
before
I
allowed
myself
to
enjoy
the
delight
of
a
union
from
which
I
expected
peace
.
552
I
remembered
also
the
necessity
imposed
upon
me
of
either
journeying
to
England
or
entering
into
a
long
correspondence
with
those
philosophers
of
that
country
whose
knowledge
and
discoveries
were
of
indispensable
use
to
me
in
my
present
undertaking
.
The
latter
method
of
obtaining
the
desired
intelligence
was
dilatory
and
unsatisfactory
;
besides
,
I
had
an
insurmountable
aversion
to
the
idea
of
engaging
myself
in
my
loathsome
task
in
my
father
's
house
while
in
habits
of
familiar
intercourse
with
those
I
loved
.
I
knew
that
a
thousand
fearful
accidents
might
occur
,
the
slightest
of
which
would
disclose
a
tale
to
thrill
all
connected
with
me
with
horror
.
I
was
aware
also
that
I
should
often
lose
all
self-command
,
all
capacity
of
hiding
the
harrowing
sensations
that
would
possess
me
during
the
progress
of
my
unearthly
occupation
.
553
I
must
absent
myself
from
all
I
loved
while
thus
employed
.
Once
commenced
,
it
would
quickly
be
achieved
,
and
I
might
be
restored
to
my
family
in
peace
and
happiness
.
My
promise
fulfilled
,
the
monster
would
depart
forever
.
Or
(
so
my
fond
fancy
imaged
)
some
accident
might
meanwhile
occur
to
destroy
him
and
put
an
end
to
my
slavery
forever
.
Отключить рекламу
554
These
feelings
dictated
my
answer
to
my
father
.
I
expressed
a
wish
to
visit
England
,
but
concealing
the
true
reasons
of
this
request
,
I
clothed
my
desires
under
a
guise
which
excited
no
suspicion
,
while
I
urged
my
desire
with
an
earnestness
that
easily
induced
my
father
to
comply
.
After
so
long
a
period
of
an
absorbing
melancholy
that
resembled
madness
in
its
intensity
and
effects
,
he
was
glad
to
find
that
I
was
capable
of
taking
pleasure
in
the
idea
of
such
a
journey
,
and
he
hoped
that
change
of
scene
and
varied
amusement
would
,
before
my
return
,
have
restored
me
entirely
to
myself
.
555
The
duration
of
my
absence
was
left
to
my
own
choice
;
a
few
months
,
or
at
most
a
year
,
was
the
period
contemplated
.
One
paternal
kind
precaution
he
had
taken
to
ensure
my
having
a
companion
.
Without
previously
communicating
with
me
,
he
had
,
in
concert
with
Elizabeth
,
arranged
that
Clerval
should
join
me
at
Strasbourg
.
This
interfered
with
the
solitude
I
coveted
for
the
prosecution
of
my
task
;
yet
at
the
commencement
of
my
journey
the
presence
of
my
friend
could
in
no
way
be
an
impediment
,
and
truly
I
rejoiced
that
thus
I
should
be
saved
many
hours
of
lonely
,
maddening
reflection
.
Nay
,
Henry
might
stand
between
me
and
the
intrusion
of
my
foe
.
If
I
were
alone
,
would
he
not
at
times
force
his
abhorred
presence
on
me
to
remind
me
of
my
task
or
to
contemplate
its
progress
?
556
To
England
,
therefore
,
I
was
bound
,
and
it
was
understood
that
my
union
with
Elizabeth
should
take
place
immediately
on
my
return
.
My
father
's
age
rendered
him
extremely
averse
to
delay
.
557
For
myself
,
there
was
one
reward
I
promised
myself
from
my
detested
toils
--
one
consolation
for
my
unparalleled
sufferings
;
it
was
the
prospect
of
that
day
when
,
enfranchised
from
my
miserable
slavery
,
I
might
claim
Elizabeth
and
forget
the
past
in
my
union
with
her
.
Отключить рекламу
558
I
now
made
arrangements
for
my
journey
,
but
one
feeling
haunted
me
which
filled
me
with
fear
and
agitation
.
During
my
absence
I
should
leave
my
friends
unconscious
of
the
existence
of
their
enemy
and
unprotected
from
his
attacks
,
exasperated
as
he
might
be
by
my
departure
.
But
he
had
promised
to
follow
me
wherever
I
might
go
,
and
would
he
not
accompany
me
to
England
?
This
imagination
was
dreadful
in
itself
,
but
soothing
inasmuch
as
it
supposed
the
safety
of
my
friends
.
I
was
agonized
with
the
idea
of
the
possibility
that
the
reverse
of
this
might
happen
.
But
through
the
whole
period
during
which
I
was
the
slave
of
my
creature
I
allowed
myself
to
be
governed
by
the
impulses
of
the
moment
;
and
my
present
sensations
strongly
intimated
that
the
fiend
would
follow
me
and
exempt
my
family
from
the
danger
of
his
machinations
.
559
It
was
in
the
latter
end
of
September
that
I
again
quitted
my
native
country
.
My
journey
had
been
my
own
suggestion
,
and
Elizabeth
therefore
acquiesced
,
but
she
was
filled
with
disquiet
at
the
idea
of
my
suffering
,
away
from
her
,
the
inroads
of
misery
and
grief
.
It
had
been
her
care
which
provided
me
a
companion
in
Clerval
--
and
yet
a
man
is
blind
to
a
thousand
minute
circumstances
which
call
forth
a
woman
's
sedulous
attention
.
She
longed
to
bid
me
hasten
my
return
;
a
thousand
conflicting
emotions
rendered
her
mute
as
she
bade
me
a
tearful
,
silent
farewell
.
560
I
threw
myself
into
the
carriage
that
was
to
convey
me
away
,
hardly
knowing
whither
I
was
going
,
and
careless
of
what
was
passing
around
.