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"
No
,
I
hate
my
life
,
"
Pierre
muttered
,
wincing
.
"
Thou
hatest
it
.
Then
change
it
,
purify
thyself
;
and
as
thou
art
purified
,
thou
wilt
gain
wisdom
.
Look
at
your
life
,
my
dear
sir
.
How
have
you
spent
it
?
In
riotous
orgies
and
debauchery
,
receiving
everything
from
society
and
giving
nothing
in
return
.
You
have
become
the
possessor
of
wealth
.
How
have
you
used
it
?
What
have
you
done
for
your
neighbor
?
Have
you
ever
thought
of
your
tens
of
thousands
of
slaves
?
Have
you
helped
them
physically
and
morally
?
No
!
You
have
profited
by
their
toil
to
lead
a
profligate
life
.
That
is
what
you
have
done
.
Have
you
chosen
a
post
in
which
you
might
be
of
service
to
your
neighbor
?
No
!
You
have
spent
your
life
in
idleness
.
Then
you
married
,
my
dear
sir
--
took
on
yourself
responsibility
for
the
guidance
of
a
young
woman
;
and
what
have
you
done
?
You
have
not
helped
her
to
find
the
way
of
truth
,
my
dear
sir
,
but
have
thrust
her
into
an
abyss
of
deceit
and
misery
.
A
man
offended
you
and
you
shot
him
,
and
you
say
you
do
not
know
God
and
hate
your
life
.
There
is
nothing
strange
in
that
,
my
dear
sir
!
"
Отключить рекламу
After
these
words
,
the
Mason
,
as
if
tired
by
his
long
discourse
,
again
leaned
his
arms
on
the
back
of
the
sofa
and
closed
his
eyes
.
Pierre
looked
at
that
aged
,
stern
,
motionless
,
almost
lifeless
face
and
moved
his
lips
without
uttering
a
sound
.
He
wished
to
say
,
"
Yes
,
a
vile
,
idle
,
vicious
life
!
"
but
dared
not
break
the
silence
.
The
Mason
cleared
his
throat
huskily
,
as
old
men
do
,
and
called
his
servant
.
"
How
about
the
horses
?
"
he
asked
,
without
looking
at
Pierre
.
"
The
exchange
horses
have
just
come
,
"
answered
the
servant
.
"
Will
you
not
rest
here
?
"
Отключить рекламу
"
No
,
tell
them
to
harness
.
"
"
Can
he
really
be
going
away
leaving
me
alone
without
having
told
me
all
,
and
without
promising
to
help
me
?
"
thought
Pierre
,
rising
with
downcast
head
;
and
he
began
to
pace
the
room
,
glancing
occasionally
at
the
Mason
.
"
Yes
,
I
never
thought
of
it
,
but
I
have
led
a
contemptible
and
profligate
life
,
though
I
did
not
like
it
and
did
not
want
to
,
"
thought
Pierre
.
"
But
this
man
knows
the
truth
and
,
if
he
wished
to
,
could
disclose
it
to
me
.
"
Pierre
wished
to
say
this
to
the
Mason
,
but
did
not
dare
to
.