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Even
just
talking
about
it
you
’
re
getting
all
bent
out
of
shape
.
"
It
was
true
.
I
could
feel
cold
,
clammy
sweat
accumulating
in
my
armpits
.
I
asked
,
"
Can
’
t
I
use
that
time
to
do
other
practices
,
instead
?
I
find
sometimes
that
if
I
go
to
the
meditation
cave
during
the
Gurugita
I
can
get
a
nice
vibe
going
for
meditation
.
"
"
Ah
-
Swamiji
would
’
ve
yelled
at
you
for
that
.
He
would
’
ve
called
you
a
chanting
thief
for
riding
on
the
energy
of
everyone
else
’
s
hard
work
.
Look
,
the
Gurugita
isn
’
t
supposed
to
be
a
fun
song
to
sing
.
It
has
a
different
function
.
It
’
s
a
text
of
unimaginable
power
.
It
is
a
mighty
purifying
practice
.
It
burns
away
all
your
junk
,
all
your
negative
emotions
.
And
I
think
it
’
s
probably
having
a
positive
effect
on
you
if
you
’
re
experiencing
such
strong
emotions
and
physical
reactions
while
you
’
re
chanting
it
.
This
stuff
can
be
painful
,
but
it
’
s
awfully
beneficial
.
"
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"
How
do
you
keep
the
motivation
to
stay
with
it
?
"
"
What
’
s
the
alternative
?
To
quit
whenever
something
gets
challenging
?
To
futz
around
your
whole
life
,
miserable
and
incomplete
?
"
"
Did
you
really
just
say
’
futz
around
’
?
"
"
Yes
.
Yes
,
I
did
.
"
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"
What
should
I
do
?
"
"
You
have
to
decide
for
yourself
.
But
my
advice
-
since
you
asked
-
is
that
you
stick
to
chanting
the
Gurugita
while
you
’
re
here
,
especially
because
you
’
re
having
such
an
extreme
reaction
to
it
.
If
something
is
rubbing
so
hard
against
you
,
you
can
be
sure
it
’
s
working
on
you
.
This
is
what
the
Gurugita
does
.
It
burns
away
the
ego
,
turns
you
into
pure
ash
.
It
’
s
supposed
to
be
arduous
,
Liz
.
It
has
power
beyond
what
can
be
rationally
understood
You
’
re
only
staying
at
the
Ashram
another
week
,
right
?
And
then
you
’
re
free
to
go
traveling
and
have
fun
.
So
just
chant
the
thing
seven
more
times
,
then
you
never
have
to
do
it
again
.
Remember
what
our
Guru
says
-
be
a
scientist
of
your
own
spiritual
experience
.
You
’
re
not
here
as
a
tourist
or
a
journalist
;
you
’
re
here
as
a
seeker
.
So
explore
it
.
"