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I
knew
you
’
d
say
that
,
she
said
.
She
was
doodling
in
the
sand
and
I
was
on
my
tummy
watching
her
.
She
said
,
what
I
mean
is
he
’
s
so
terribly
good
-
looking
,
one
could
forget
he
’
s
so
stupid
.
You
might
think
,
I
could
marry
him
and
teach
him
.
Couldn
’
t
you
?
And
you
know
you
couldn
’
t
.
Or
you
could
go
to
bed
with
him
just
for
fun
and
one
day
you
’
d
suddenly
find
you
were
in
love
with
his
body
and
you
couldn
’
t
live
without
it
and
you
’
d
be
stuck
with
his
rotten
mind
for
ever
and
ever
.
Then
she
said
,
doesn
’
t
it
terrify
you
?
Not
more
than
so
many
other
things
.
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I
’
m
serious
.
If
you
married
him
I
’
d
never
speak
to
you
again
.
And
she
was
serious
.
That
very
quick
grey
shy
look
she
puts
on
,
like
a
little
lance
.
I
got
up
and
kissed
her
on
the
way
up
and
went
to
meet
the
boys
.
And
she
sat
there
,
still
looking
down
at
the
sand
.
We
’
re
both
terrible
lookers
-
through
.
We
can
’
t
help
it
.
But
she
’
s
always
said
,
I
believe
this
,
I
shall
act
like
this
.
It
’
s
got
to
be
someone
you
at
least
feel
is
your
equal
,
who
can
look
through
as
well
as
you
.
And
the
body
thing
’
s
always
got
to
be
second
.
And
I
’
ve
always
secretly
thought
,
Carmen
will
be
another
spinster
.
It
’
s
too
complicated
for
set
ideas
.
But
now
I
think
of
G
.
P
.
and
I
compare
him
to
Piers
.
And
Piers
has
got
nothing
on
his
side
.
Just
a
golden
body
throwing
stones
aimlessly
into
the
sea
.
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November
5th
I
gave
him
hell
tonight
.
I
started
throwing
things
around
upstairs
.
First
cushions
and
then
plates
.
I
’
ve
been
longing
to
break
them
.