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851
I
recall
once
overhearing
Norma
and
one
of
her
girl
friends
playing
in
her
room
,
and
Norma
shouting
:
"
He
is
not
my
real
brother
!
He
s
just
a
boy
we
took
in
because
we
felt
sorry
for
him
.
My
mamma
told
me
,
and
she
said
I
can
tell
everyone
now
that
he
s
not
really
my
brother
at
all
.
"
852
I
wish
this
memory
were
a
photograph
so
that
I
could
tear
it
up
and
throw
it
back
into
her
face
.
I
want
to
call
back
across
the
years
and
tell
her
I
never
meant
to
stop
her
from
getting
her
dog
.
She
could
have
had
it
all
to
herself
,
and
I
wouldn
t
have
fed
it
,
or
brushed
it
,
or
played
with
it
and
I
would
never
have
made
it
like
me
more
than
it
liked
her
.
I
only
wanted
her
to
play
games
with
me
the
way
we
used
to
.
I
never
meant
to
do
anything
that
would
hurt
her
at
all
.
853
June
6
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854
My
first
real
quarrel
with
Alice
today
.
My
fault
.
I
wanted
to
see
her
.
Often
,
after
a
disturbing
memory
or
dream
,
talking
to
her
just
being
with
her
makes
me
feel
better
.
But
it
was
a
mistake
to
go
down
to
the
Center
to
pick
her
up
.
855
I
had
not
been
back
to
the
Center
for
Retarded
Adults
since
the
operation
,
and
the
thought
of
seeing
the
place
was
exciting
.
856
It
s
on
Twenty
-
third
Street
,
east
of
Fifth
Av
­
enue
,
in
an
old
schoolhouse
that
has
been
used
by
the
Beekman
University
Clinic
for
the
last
five
years
as
a
cen
­
ter
for
experimental
education
special
classes
for
the
handicapped
.
The
sign
outside
on
the
doorway
,
framed
by
the
old
spiked
gateway
,
is
just
a
gleaming
brass
plate
that
says
C
.
R
.
A
.
Beekman
Extension
.
857
Her
class
ended
at
eight
,
but
I
wanted
to
see
the
room
where
not
so
long
ago
I
had
struggled
over
simple
reading
and
writing
and
learned
to
count
change
of
a
dollar
.
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858
I
went
inside
,
slipped
up
to
the
door
,
and
,
keeping
out
of
sight
,
I
looked
through
the
window
.
Alice
was
at
her
desk
,
and
in
a
chair
beside
her
was
a
thin
-
faced
woman
I
didn
t
recognize
.
She
was
frowning
that
open
frown
of
un
­
concealed
puzzlement
,
and
I
wondered
what
Alice
was
try
­
ing
to
explain
.
859
Near
the
blackboard
was
Mike
Dorni
in
his
wheel
­
chair
,
and
there
in
his
usual
first
-
row
first
-
seat
was
Lester
Braun
,
who
,
Alice
said
,
was
the
smartest
in
the
group
.
Lester
had
learned
easily
what
I
had
struggled
over
,
but
he
came
when
he
felt
like
it
,
or
he
stayed
away
to
earn
money
waxing
floors
.
I
guess
if
he
had
cared
at
all
if
it
had
been
important
to
him
as
it
was
to
me
they
would
have
used
him
for
this
experiment
.
There
were
new
faces
,
too
,
people
I
didn
t
know
.
860
Finally
,
I
got
up
the
nerve
to
go
in
.