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"
An
empty
,
stupid
smile
.
"
"
No
,
a
warm
,
real
smile
,
because
you
wanted
people
to
like
you
.
"
"
And
they
played
tricks
on
me
,
and
laughed
at
me
.
"
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"
Yes
,
but
even
though
you
didn
t
understand
why
they
were
laughing
,
you
sensed
that
if
they
could
laugh
at
you
they
would
like
you
.
And
you
wanted
them
to
like
you
.
You
acted
like
a
child
and
you
even
laughed
at
yourself
along
with
them
.
"
"
I
don
t
feel
like
laughing
at
myself
right
now
,
if
you
don
t
mind
.
"
She
was
trying
to
keep
from
crying
.
I
think
I
wanted
to
make
her
cry
.
"
Maybe
that
s
why
it
was
so
important
for
me
to
learn
.
I
thought
it
would
make
people
like
me
.
I
thought
I
would
have
friends
.
That
s
something
to
laugh
at
,
isn
t
it
?
"
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"
There
s
more
to
it
than
just
having
a
high
I
.
Q
.
"
That
made
me
angry
.
Probably
because
I
didn
t
really
understand
what
she
was
driving
at
.
More
and
more
these
days
she
didn
t
come
right
out
and
say
what
she
meant
.
She
hinted
at
things
.
She
talked
around
them
and
expected
me
to
know
what
she
was
thinking
.
And
I
listened
,
pre
­
tending
I
understood
but
inside
I
was
afraid
she
would
see
that
I
missed
the
point
completely
.
"
I
think
it
s
time
for
you
to
leave
.
"